Based on Peter Block’s renowned book “Flawless Consulting®”
In the world of consulting, the word support is everywhere, often paired with promises like “We’re here for you,” or “We’ll take care of it.” While well-intentioned, these messages can blur the line between genuine help and over-responsibility.
At Effiqual | Designed Learning Canada, we teach a different perspective. In the Flawless Consulting® model, support does not mean protecting clients from discomfort, taking ownership of their problems, or doing the hard work for them. Instead, it means accompanying clients in a way that enables and empowers them to care for themselves.
Support in this model is about partnership, not parenthood. It’s grounded in mutual respect, systems awareness, and the belief that clients have the capacity, and responsibility, to lead their own transformation.
The Myth of Protective Support
One of the most common missteps consultants make, especially those with a strong sense of care, is offering reassurance that unintentionally disempowers the client.
Statements like:
- “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of this.”
- “I won’t let this happen to you.”
- “I’ve got you, just leave it to me.”
While they may sound comforting, these phrases send the wrong signal. They position the consultant as a rescuer, and the client as someone who needs saving. Over time, this dynamic can:
- Reinforce dependency
- Erode trust
- Undermine accountability
- Confuse the consultant’s role with that of a parent or fixer
This isn’t support, it’s over-functioning. And it gets in the way of the partnership that Flawless Consulting® is built on.
Real Support Is Rooted in Partnership
The essence of Flawless Consulting® is relationship, not dominance, not deference, but mutual engagement.
In this model, the role of the consultant is not to protect the client from their own uncertainty or discomfort. Instead, it’s to stand beside them with clarity and care, offering tools, presence, and reflection, not answers or rescue.
We don’t take responsibility for the client’s growth. We create the conditions for it.
In systems terms, this means recognizing that the client:
- Owns the content
- Owns the decisions
- Owns the consequences
As consultants, we own the process: how we engage, how we inquire, how we hold space. And we offer support that empowers, rather than shields.
The Difference Between Helping and Holding
At Effiqual | Designed Learning Canada, we emphasize that real support is not about doing for, it’s about being with. This shows up in several ways:
- Instead of “Don’t worry, I’ve got this,” say: “I’ll walk with you through this. Let’s look at it together.”
- Instead of “I’ll make sure this doesn’t go wrong,” say: “Let’s explore what you need to feel confident moving forward.”
- Instead of “Leave it to me,” say: “You’ve got this, I’ll support you as you take the lead.”
This subtle shift from rescuing to reflecting respects the client’s agency, and reminds both parties of their rightful role.
Support Begins with Vulnerability
The Flawless Consulting® journey starts with modeling vulnerability. In the early stages, particularly during contracting, we share how we’re feeling in the moment. This models transparency and builds trust.
Later, as the client begins to open up, especially when sharing concerns about control, vulnerability, or commitment, the consultant’s role is not to reassure those concerns. Instead, we honor them, stay curious, and help the client unpack what they mean.
This type of support:
- Validates the client’s experience
- Maintains clear boundaries
- Encourages emotional maturity
- Reinforces the system’s capacity to self-correct
It’s not about promising ease. It’s about building resilience.
Systems Thinking and Client Ownership
From a systems thinking perspective, effective support means enabling the system to self-regulate and evolve. If the consultant assumes too much responsibility, it creates imbalance in the system. The client becomes dependent, the consultant overburdened, and neither party operates at full capacity.
Instead, we aim to distribute responsibility appropriately:
- The client stays responsible for their own system, decisions, and future.
- The consultant supports by illuminating patterns, offering feedback, and guiding process.
This alignment ensures that change is not only effective, but sustainable, because it comes from within the system itself.
Support as a Developmental Act
In Flawless Consulting®, we don’t view support as a safety net. We see it as a developmental force.
Our job is to:
- Invite our clients to step into their own authority
- Reflect their capacity back to them
- Ask powerful questions that build self-awareness
- Celebrate their risks and resilience
- Be present when they doubt themselves, without stepping in to solve
This is slow work. Deep work. Human work. And when done well, it leads to something far more valuable than compliance or relief: it leads to growth.
What Support Really Looks Like in Practice
Here’s what giving support might look like across different phases of the consulting cycle:
- Contracting: Being transparent about your role while inviting the client to clarify theirs.
- Discovery: Helping the client see how they contribute to the system, without judgment.
- Feedback: Delivering clear messages that empower the client to choose, not comply.
- Dealing with Resistance: Holding space for discomfort without trying to make it go away.
- Implementation: Standing by the client as they take action, not doing it for them.
In each case, support is not about easing the burden, it’s about sharing the load wisely.
Ready to Redefine What Support Means?
Join our Flawless Consulting® workshops and learn how to offer support that empowers, not overprotects. Discover how to stand in true partnership with your clients, helping them lead their own change, on their own terms.
Because the best support doesn’t make people dependent, it makes them stronger.
